Blaise, Ah, my Blaise.  There's no one like him in the world.  He's three, going on four in Feb. and just a delight. Lovely bubbly personality.  All the enthusiasm of a three year old...and then some.
So the other day, we were in the kitchen, and he had his hands reaching up to me beckoning me to pick him up.  His hands were just the height of my belly, and inevitably landed on my protruding middle. And he asks,
'So what's in there???' pulling at my sweater.  The sweetness, and honesty, and sheer curiosity was so adorable!!!  I looked at him a little in disbelief.  I guess he didn't get the memo a month ago when we told the kids about the next baby.  I guess he thought weekly discussions of whether he wanted a boy or girl were just normal conversations among children in his world.
So I smiled and knelt down, and told him there was a baby in my belly, and that we're going to have another baby.  He smiled, too, of course.
Later that evening, I saw him go over to Sam and tell him we were going to have another baby.  It was so adorable.
Then, after much thinking, he came over to me, and with the most sincere face, said, 'So is the baby in your belly a girl, or a boy?'  I told him we didn't know and we'd have to wait till it was born to see.  In which he quickly ran to his buddy, Sam, and told him as much.

Of Fire, and life

After living in our new home for six months, I finally feel like I can hang pictures, or curtains, or something.  It's finally starting to feel a bit more like a home, less like a burden.
We didn't get finished all the things we wanted to this summer.  After a much-needed vacation of sorts in July, August was to be dedicated to 'finishing' the basement.  Ah, but then Dan and I had the classic conversation about this task ending up something like this:
Dan: "The basement is not even on my list of things to do right now!"
Me: "The basement IS my list!!"
I was secretly a bit relieved.  School planning was consuming me, and I desperately wanted to get off on a good foot with school this year.  The basement would have to wait.
The fall projects we had in mind have also taken a back seat.  Dan's now working 10, soon to be 12 hr. days.  Today is day 19 he's worked. No days off.
The transition has been difficult, to say the least. Getting up so early, going to bed much earlier, getting through dinner and sometimes bedtime with no helper has made for some long day.  Throw in some nausea and fatigue (oh yeah, baby no.6) it sure was like a hit with a cannonball!  I didn't realize how much I depend on my beloved to help me out with even the smallest things in order to keep our lives running smoothly.
So today I am thanking God over and over for those little things.  It's taken me a little while to get there. After throwing enough fits over Dan not being home and feeling just so yucky every day, and realizing the kids aren't just going to magically go away when I want peace and quiet, somethings had to change.
Confession was a must. Always a must.  Always forgotten grace to be tapped into.  So healing, and just perfect.
Trying to eat better so I don't feel so yucky.  Kinda obvious.   There's something about a pregnant brain, and stomach too, that mimics insanity.  Now meal planning: that would be the magical cure!  Working on that.
One of the joys I have found in the last week was simply our wood burning stove.  It's an insert in our fireplace.  When we moved, we asked the owner if he ever used it to heat the house, and he said he tried, and it didn't really make a difference.  We used it occasionally last winter, more for novelty.
We hadn't turned the furnace on yet this fall.  We were doing school on day and we were all kind of chilly.  I  was bracing myself, not looking forward to another winter like last year.  One of the unexpected things of this house from the day we moved in was how cold it was. Every. Day. And I generously donated most of my sweaters before we moved.  (I never wore them at the other, warm, small, cozy house!)  So this particular morning, I thought, this is just how it is- chilly.  I noticed the temp was around 62, and I had this thought of when we are supposed to turn the furnace on. Thankfully, that evening, Dan did just that.  Except it didn't turn on.  Well, of course not.  That is how our life has been for the last six months.  Nothing has been the way it's 'supposed' to. So of course, the furnace wouldn't start.
Enter our wood burning stove.
We had to use it.  The temps at night were going to dip down to freezing in a few days.  We had to do something.  We had lots of wood (thank God!) we happened upon this past summer, much of it already split. It was a bit tricky, but Dan started the fire, with not too much smoke in the house. The result: amazing!!!  For the first time ever in this house, I knew there was a place to go to be warm!!! And the heat it put off was so wonderful!  I was thrilled to have such a spot in the house, but skeptical it could really make the house warm.  Lets just say, I love waking up every morning to check and see where the temperature is.  It's almost always at 70 or above. I'll take that over 62 any day!!!  Yes, the living room is the warmest room, and it does get cooler the farther away you get.  Upstairs is still pretty chilly.  The kids all have warm blankets and insist they're hot at night.  I notice Joseph almost sleeps through the night now, and I sleep soo much better as well.
I'm not sure why I find such joy in this stove.  Maybe it's the fulfillment of a nostalgic dream to live a somewhat primitive way.  Maybe it's because we succeeded where the previous owner failed at making it 'work'.  Maybe it's because we can heat our home comfortable for NO cost!  Maybe it's because Dan got good at tweaking it so it really is so simple to maintain.  Much more simple than I thought. Maybe it keeps me warm when I'm cold. :)
And lastly: I saw how Dan annoyingly started the fire each time he had to do it.  I mean start it from nothing.  It's easy to keep the fire going, but to start it is a bit tricky.  Well, especially when we don't have the best kindling yet.  So anyway, I knew I would have to do this at some point, so I was trying to observe closely.  Sure enough, that time came yesterday.  We had gone to co-op all day, and I  didn't really keep the fire burning much while we were gone.  So I was praying when we got home there would be enough embers for me to just throw another log on.  There were embers.  Like, three of them.  Ugh. I started with a little wad of paper, and then some cardboard, and then a log. Shut the doors and hoped it would work.  There was a lot of smoke. It's a little different than a bonfire outside. Here, everything is in your control: heat, air, fuel. You have to tweak what you need more of to make a good fire. (What a science lesson!)  More air. Open the vents.  Sure enough, like magic, I can see through those little vents the orange glow of a fire.  I did it!!  I didn't need to start it from scratch!  Those three little embers turned into a 'roaring' fire!
God, what were you telling me in all this??? I just instantly kept thinking about how small those embers were.  Yet, how hot, and on fire they were.  They had every bit the potential to start that whole fire.  Ah, like our souls. Our faith, our hope, our charity.  We have all the potential for virtue in us to praise and glorify God through our humble daily lives.  If that great fire is possible from those few small embers, what greatness is possible for us, with small fire that burns in us?  I pray I have that love for Christ, that small ember that never ever goes out, so he can help to transform it into a roaring fire of love for Him.

Is this what grace looks like?

Just a quick note about what happened last night.
Home renovation is in full swing with a busy schedule and plans to move in soon!!!  Very exciting! We're at the house on Mon, Wed, Fri and Sat.  I love having a routine to work around, despite it's busyness.
So, we were supposed to finish sanding the floors last night.  I was going to the basement to get an extension cord, just to find a huge puddle in the basement.  By huge, I mean half of the basement!!!  Water, that covered my boot when I stepped in it!  Obviously the floor drain in the basement wasn't working.  We pieced together what happened rather quickly.  There is a drain right outside the basement garage door, and it was clogged.  All the rain water we got leaked in by the garage door, and through to the basement.  The basement drain, which is connected to the other drain, was clogged as well.  Thus a lot of misplaced water.  I was nervously uneasy about the whole thing, praying constantly that it would be resolved.  Dan, though disappointed, seemed ready for the task and just went to work at it.  He called his Dad (of course!)  After the call, he was confidently assessing the property, before he headed to Home Depot for some tools.  He came home with a beefy looking snake and proceeded to clean out the drains.  The outside one cleared, but the one in the basement was a little more tricky, requiring help from the shop vac. Dan pretty much vacuumed out all the debris that was clogging that drain. And thanks be to God we got all the water cleaned up.
Now, about the grace.  I'm not going to lie.  When things go wrong in our life, we can get frustrated, angry, irritable, grumpy- you get the idea.  It makes communication worse, and in turn, the whole situation worse.  What happened?  We didn't do that!  We saw the situation.  Dan went right to work, and I jumped in to help wherever I could.  I don't ever recall having an unexpected situation go so well. Yes, I breathed a prayer every time Dan was clearing the drain, or examining the pipelines.  So is this how life looks like when touched by grace???  To have calamities happen, and walk away feeling...happier? Happier that we didn't have to spend three times the amount of money to hire someone to fix it?  Happier that Home Depot was so close, and had a tool that worked for us in this situation? Happier that we found strength to keep the negative comments away, so as to focus on the job, and help each other?  Happier that I have a dear, dear sister willing and able to take my kids home for me so I could stay and help Dan?  Happier that it was only a clogged drain, and not leaking basement walls?  Happier that I had planned my meals, and so after all this mess, I knew we would have a hearty, hot meal at home?  Happier that Dan has a dad he can call, to talk to about such calamities, and how it always, ALWAYS, helps him?
Driving home last night I had tears in my eyes and full, grateful heart.  Thanks be to God for his grace in our life.

Last day, last hour of October daybook

Outside my window::
dark. cold.  Too cold too soon.

I am listening to::
stupid tv. Ummm, changing that right now to Pandora. Jason Mraz anyone? Now on to Taylor Swift.
And finishing up with Michael Buble.

I am wearing::
red plaid flannel jammies.

I am thankful for::
a closing date on our home!!!  Tuesday is the magical day.  I wanted to try to squeeze it in Monday because I'm so anxious to get it, but we settled for Tuesday.  It will be here soon enough.

I am pondering::
Oh, lots of thoughts sneak in each day now, of where to put what in the new home, and decorating ideas.  It just brings lots of smiles.

I am reading::
The Rhythm of Life  by Matthew Kelly.  Love it so far.  It's very simple read, but the timing of it is perfect for me.  I just love each chapter more than the next.  Where was this book when I was 19!  It's just great. Albeit, I'm not getting through it nearly fast enough.

From the kitchen::
A MEAL PLAN!!!  This is the second week I've written down a meal plan...in over two years.  Yeah, I've been winging it pretty much ever since Blaise was born!  So nice to have it down in writing.  So nice to know what's for dinner- sides and all.  So tonight- Pork tenderloin smoked on the grill, and roasted root veggies.  I even made chocolate drop cookies the other night- out of the blue.  Fabulous.

I am creating::
Hmmm- nothing.  Much to my dismay.  My crafting bug is curling into a ball and atrophying due to lack of use.  I long to touch fabric and hear the whir of my machine.  I need to knit Joseph a stocking.  The thought of home decorating is a newfound joy in life.  Sigh.  But none of that yet.  No new halloween Costumes- just used what was in the bin.  I think they looked pretty good anyway (Rose was in costume in this pic.  She wanted so badly to be Black Widow, from the Avengers.  I thought she did pretty good on the fly.  We went out again tonight to Lorraine's house and she dressed up as last year's 'Tangled' Repunzel).

On my iPod::
Pintrist.  Very much liking wasting time on that.  Mostly having to do with ideas for the new house.

Towards a real education::
Well, we are doing some school every day.  Does that count? Sadly, I'd say we're doing what we might do in a couple days to stretch all week (we only do four days a week anyway).  I guess it's not terrible, but it really wears on me.

Towards rhythm and beauty::
We were going to try a new routine this month with the packing and all.  That all halted when the appraisal for the home came back low and things looked iffy.  We went back to doing school.  Trying to regain our 'normal' rhythm.  Not doing well at achieving it with bathroom construction everywhere you look, and some packed boxes/empty boxes everywhere else.  Beauty.  A new bathroom.  It and the kitchen are the only safe havens in the house (but the kitchen is iffy because it can get backlogged easily with laundry, etc.). But the bathroom.  Ah, soooo nice.  Nice new tile.  Nice new tub and as of tonight- a shower!  Nice new toilet. Nice new painted walls, and tonight- trim.  Tomorrow- the sink and trim.  Very beautiful.

To live the liturgy::
I helped arrange the flowers for the altar for the feast of Christ the King this past Sunday.  A great creative outlet for the lack of creativity in my life as mentioned above.  I got to buy all the flowers with someone else's (the church's) money, arrange them all, and leave them, and the mess there ! (someone else cleaned up for me!)  I might like that flower committee after all.

I am hoping and praying::
for the upcoming election.  Praying Obama is defeated.
Praying for those that have left the faith or lost the faith.  They weigh heavy on me sometimes.  Rose and I talked a bit about this in her lesson today concerning the Mystical Body of Christ.  Lots of good stuff.  So cool to share it with her.
Hoping for a smooth closing on our house.

In the garden::
Ah, the garden.  Last week, when it was thirty degrees warmer (yes, near 80), I decided to seize the day and we cleaned the front yard.  Raked leaves, gathered sticks, and I cleaned my front beds.  I raked them, and pruned the plants.  I didn't do that last year, so I was happy to do it this year, leaving the whole thing looking so much neater.  I wanted to do it to my herb garden and hosta garden in back, but I'm not so sure the weather will agree.  Maybe Saturday.  It's supposed to be near 50.  I'm trying to plot how to kill two birds with one stone- thin my perennials...and take them with me to the new house!

Around the house::
Boxes, laundry baskets, shower doors, power tools, painting supplies, a shop vac.  I think that covers it.

On keeping home::
Sigh.  Just about impossible.  This is extreme mothering.  Bits of stuff everywhere with a crawling infant! We've gone to blocking the hallway so Joseph has to stay in the kitchen or living room.  That has helped him to stay out of the bathroom construction.

One of my favorite things::
La la la la laaaaaa  I love listening to Joseph at eight months.  La la la...da da da...and most recently ga ga ga.  He really works at that g sound.  Sooo wonderful and adorable.

A few plans for the rest of the week::
All Saint's Day- here already!!  Mass in the evening.
All Soul's Day- one of my new favorite days in the church.  It will be very busy- Mass in the morning, church basement mopping, and, of course, a visit to and prayers at the cemetery.  Maybe a lunch break at Panera. :)
Sat. our 11th wedding anniversary- Yeah! No set plans yet, but some ideas.
Sun. my birthday, and our church's All Saint's party.  Hoping to find a bit of relaxation that day.

A few forgotten things I am thankful for::
God's presence in my life.  When our bid on the house was accepted, I tried to go into some sort of organized packing mode.  It only brought about much stress.  Then the appraisal came back low and the deal looked shaky.  It immediately made me stop in my packing tracks, and just be patient.  Take it a day at a time and pray. Now- a closing on the horizon: less stress, more trust in Him. So we may move more gradually...into December.  Not a concern.  I'm ready for whatever.  And it just is sooooo nice. To feel His presence. His guidance.

And don't know that I ever mentioned it before, but God sooo knew what he was doing when he gave us a baby this year. :)  I can see how last year was so, out of sorts for me- all at once, on so many levels.  And now- lots going on in life- always.  And it's okay.  And we have a delightful, smiley, squishy, happy baby to share it all with us!  God is so good, all the time.

Forgot to add the beauty part of the beauty part of the day in my previous post.  It was a gorgeous fall day...a little on the cool side.  We wanted to do...something, but as usual, couldn't figure out what to do! We ended up going to the local tennis courts so the kids could show daddy what they had learned.  How fun.  For me it was like tennis on steroids.  I had Joseph on my back in a backpack.  Dan on one side of the net, me on the other, and four kids wherever they wanted!  Yep, a few of them got conked with the ball.  But it was fun to laugh at all the near misses and see how we managed to get in some fun exercise.  And I know it's sooo trivial, but the fact that I had dinner in the oven while we were out made me so happy!  So we came home to a warm yummy dinner.  Happy family. :)

My sorely neglected blog has been replaced with real estate search engines.

But I wanted to write about just another great day.
I was up early with the boys...Joseph and Blaise are 7am risers.  Dan and Rose went to early Mass, and I went to St. Albert's at 9:30 with Sam.  DD had a fever.  And we were scheduled to look at a house in Troy at noon.

All went fine.

The property was lovely.  Lots of landscaped trees, and a stream on the edge.  3.5 acres.  Huge house.  I wasn't thrilled with the house layout, but I knew it was big enough we could make it work.  Dan liked  it.  I could tell. But, it's bank owned.  I was reluctant to get my hopes up, as I explained to Dan.  Although we didn't say it, we both left thinking it was kinda too good to be true...not to mention the slim chance of all the financing to work out on a bank-owned property.

We got home, and I was sitting in the van with the two sleeping littles.  After a few minutes, Dan came out, and told me the realtor from the Kitridge house just called. Hmmm....

Rewind.  Four days ago we put a bid on a house on Kitridge Rd.  It took us at least a month from the time we saw the house.  Lots of thinking going on.  We finally put in a pretty low bid (higher than what we originally said we'd bid!), expecting a counter offer.  We got a call back the next day saying our offer had been rejected.  No counter.  OK.  I was a little bummed.  But not devastation.  I think it's by the grace of God I didn't take it harder than I did.  Dan, on the other hand was right back looking at houses.  The realtor kept calling, to discuss the situation.  We saw it as pointless.  We had been told the owner rejected offers 10k more than what we offered.  This guy was not budging. I called the realtor back, and told him we were going to walk from the house.  I explained it as our highest bid for negotiation would probably be his lowest, and we understood that it just wouldn't work out.  He kinda surprised me by asking how much that was, and when I told him, he said he'd run that past the selling realtor.  I got off the phone, kinda shaking my head, thinking he's wasting his time.  I seriously didn't give it another thought.

We got home today, and Dan came out to the van to tell me, that he ran the price past the selling realtor, and the owner would accept it.  He just wanted it in writing.
????????
But we'd moved on!  We were looking at this other house, beginning the workings to see if it would fit for us.  And now?  Back to this other house?  When we wrote off that house, I thought of the cons to it- the things that weren't so great about it, looking for consolation.  Now, it's back in front of us.  I wasn't sure how to feel.  I had pretty much convinced myself it wasn't worth it.  But I allowed myself to think of the pros to this house.  There really were a lot of good things about it.

So we met with the realtor and revised our offer.  I'm still a little in disbelief.  We'll see what tomorrow holds.


On a different note, I just want to mention how well things have been going.  I am so aware of God's presence in my life, helping and guiding me along. I am so, so grateful for the things I've learned at counselling about myself, and my life.  In some ways, I can't even believe how and why things are sooo much better with me.  I have a better outlook on things, and am just plain happier! But the biggest thing is also being at peace. I am at peace with the way I see things, and deal with them.  This, in turn, makes for a more joy-filled, meaningful life!  It may kinda seem like nothing.  And believe me, sometimes I think it's weird to be so aware, or joyful over things that can seem very everyday and routine.  But I guess when I compare it to where I was a year ago...I'm in a much better place. :)

I'll keep this brief...if that's at all possible for me.
I just want to remember waking up today, a bit groggy but needing to hit the floor running for not hearing my alarm.  Then waking up to Blaise (I usually savor my early morning to myself, if I don't crawl back in bed).  A beautiful morning it was.  Out the door early with the kiddos and a fabulous morning to myself, many, many thanks to my sister.
I delighted in a cup of coffee and just took it all in.  I want to say today is the beginning of a new...???  I just felt different.  I learned some things about myself, and in figuring things out, made my future seem so much brighter.  And truth is, is was brighter.  A brighter day, a brighter outlook, a brighter life. :)  Yes, I like that so much. I feel stronger, determined, capable, trusting, lighter, excited, free-er, just plain happier.

Thought of Janelle today about her recent posts of loving her kids, at this age, and having so much fun with them.
Sadly, I don't often feel that way.  I feel very swamped with duties, and schedules of plans I make that I sometimes feel like it's all too much- too much kids, too much stuff, too much to manage.  Just not a lot of fun.
BUT, this summer, I had a chance to play some board games with the kids, and we had so much fun.  What games?  Cranium Cadoo for one.  Had a blast!!!  Poor Dan, always competitive, can't be beat by the kids! Ha!  But some of them need that- to know they can't always win.  So we play two rounds. :) It was so neat how it was just like our favorite game Cranium, but suited for their level.  So much fun.
The other? Star Wars Monopoly.  I didn't know we didn't own the original monopoly.  So we learned on  the Star Wars version (a little weird, I may add).  The kids had so much fun!  It's funny how I think we're playing this game and they barely get it.  They are just way too young to get it.  But they had so much fun!  Ah, I so remember being little and wanting to do things bigger kids did. It is so neat to be the bigger 'kid', and get to play these games with them and just let them enjoy learning something new and feeling so much older!

And today, well, was great.  I had a glimmer of a thought this early morning that said 'I should go running today.'  Well, I didn't think much more of it than that, and certainly not when we piled out of the car at 4p after a long afternoon at my sister's house.  Blaise and Joseph fell asleep on the way home, leaving me to actually chat with Dan when he got home.  Then it just struck me, that it was so beautiful out, I should go running...now!  Rose had to dance at 5:30.  It was 4:40.  I told the kids they could bike down to the park with me while I ran.  I never saw them move so fast!  We had a lovely trek down there, and I ran a bit and then we came back.  All in 30 minutes!  My favorite was running while pushing Sam on his new bike with training wheels.  It's a fun little bike, but I stress little.  It's too small, so he has to pedal continuously to keep up with the others.  So I just pushed him while I ran.  And it was while we were out I kept thinking "this is just so much fun!"  I really do love to do things with my kids that they enjoy too.

Praising God, and thanking God for a glimpse of happiness today.  A glimpse of happiness that I can have every day.  Deo Gratias!

Me: Want to talk to Joseph?
Blaise:  Hi Joseph! Hi Joe baby!  Rumor has it.  Rumor has it.

Blaise makes me happy.  So thankful for our Blaise.

I love music.
So, when the fabulous Hallie at Betty Beguiles had this link up, I just had to join in.  We have such list of love songs, and we add to over the years.  Here's the Peyton version, in no particular order:

Fun, happy dreaming song.



Cute lovey song.




Our fifth anniversary!




Love Dean, and Return to Me (movie).




We love Alan Jackson- great love song.





Lovely Enya song :)





Our wedding song :)



Okay, I could've put every Michael Buble song on here, as we really love them all.  But this one in particular has been so great when getting over any rough patches in marriage.


Favorite favorite song right now.  Just love the message, as applied to a marriage.


And yep, honey, these words ring true!!

 "The mark of a Catholic is the ability to see the Divine where it is least expected: in a baby in the arms of his mother, in bread and wine, in prayers tolled on beads, in the voice of an old man in Rome." Fulton Sheen

Love this!  I think I need to work on my vision, though, and find the divine in the laundry and the dishes!!!

Above is the lone picture I have of our blow-out fifth birthday party for Samuel...Star Wars style.
Hopefully I'll get some pics from someone.  Otherwise, I just have the memories...
Two outdoor pop-up tents wrapped in black plastic for our 'cantina'.  Serving Darth dogs (hot dogs on both ends of a skewer), yoda soda, jedi juice, padawan popcorn, edible ewoks (gummy bears), vader veggies with droid dip, and millennium melon, and chewie wookie cookies (little debbie star crunch with icing faces).

All the chaos and imperfection of the day are fading, as I remember the fun things.  All 21 boys (family and rosary group) were issued light sabers and 'trained' to use them.  They hit balloons with them, broke bubbles, and mastered basic movements.

Then on to crossing hot lava.  Red tablecloths were lava on the driveway, with 'rocks' painted on cardboard. Each boy got a rock and had to use teamwork to pass one to each teammate as they crossed the lava one step at a time.  I thought that was a really neat game.

Then on to destroying the first death star.  Talented brother in law drew and awesome death star on the driveway, and the kids took turns throwing water balloons at it.  That bought me some time to bring food out for our lunch.

After lunch, we did blaster training with water guns, and lastly, destroyed the death star pinata.  They were re-issued their light sabers and blasters with a Jedi knight certificate. Oh, and how could I forget the Jedi robes.  They took so very long to make all 25 (I made ones for littles too!).  I couldn't have done it without the help of my very talented niece.

Oh, it was a lot of fun.  A lot of work in such a short time, but a lot of fun, too.

Lots of change

I have a feeling this year is one for lots of change.  New baby. New routine with a family of seven.
Mom getting a house! :)  I am so super excited about this. Very stressful for her, but I feel like it will happen sooner than later.
Looking for a house for us.  Sigh. I want to say we're 'serious', but we don't even have a realtor.  Just doing a whole lot of online looking.  Really tricky.  Sometimes I think we'll never find what we want and can afford, and just end up 'settling' for something.
Lots of moving in Dan's family.  Jesse and Anna to KY, Dave and Jodie to Piqua.  Steve??? Hmmm... that would be great if he would move back here.  And so he says he will. Hmmm.  Lots of prayers going out for that situation.
Ah, lots of changes this year.

Oh yeah, THAT phase of motherhood

So pregnancy and birth behind me, and now we're in the full throes of postpartum motherhood. Gone is my meticulously clean house. I sit and look and look at that basket of clothes that needs folded. Needed folded for almost a week now! Maybe it's because it's in my living room which makes it a bit more annoying than if it were conveniently tucked away in a bedroom or laundry room where it couldn't remind me that the laundry needed folding! Ah, but I gladly hold my warm baby and feed him, and know the folding can wait.

Gone are the soothing, long bubble baths that punctuated my last trimester of pregnancy. Now we've moved into 'hurry up before the baby wakes' showers. BUT, at least I get a shower every few days, or so.

Gone are the cooking in bulk and freezing every last thing I could. Now we indulge in all the fruits of my labors. Wait, not really. We have been SO blessed this time around to have so many meals made and delivered to us!!!! What a blessing! Tuesday, I took Rose to dance, with all the kids, and when we returned, I made dinner. Ruben sandwiches and potato pancakes. The corned beef was already cooked, so I just made the potato pancakes. We ate at 8p. I'm thoroughly convinced that new moms should just get meals delivered to them for the first six months of that baby's life. It just makes things ever so much easier! Ah, but I am so truly grateful to all those families that helped us out, in any way, this time around. The transition to this phase of motherhood has been so gradual, and such a good way to get adjusted to having a little one around again.

"Reason is always a kind of brute force; those who appeal to the head rather than the heart, however pallid and polite, are necessarily men of violence. We speak of 'touching' a man's heart, but we can do nothing to his head but hit it."

-G.K. Chesterton

"A dead thing can go with the stream, but only a living thing can go against it."

-G.K. Chesterton

Welcome Joseph Ambrose!

Welcome new little addition to our growing family! Ah, yes, another boy! You were born at home, in the arms of your mom and dad, and the presence of an amazing birth team. It was quite a bit of work to get you here, but with the strength from God, you came healthy, happy in the wee hours of the morning.

Big sister, of course, a pro at this now. She's so good at holding you.

Dominic, another pro, and super excited to have another brother.

Sam, in true fashion, very reserved and just watched, for a long while, before agreeing to hold you. And beaming once you were in his arms!

And then there's this little joker. He was the first to hold you, held you the longest, and cried when we had to take you away! Nothing but pure, utter love for you, baby. It is so beautiful to witness.

In fact, it is something I will never tire of seeing, and hope remains strong in our family always. The joy, and love, and togetherness that a new baby brings to the whole family. The fabric of our family was just tightened a bit closer because of you, Joseph! We look forward to all the fun and happiness you will bring us!

Just a quick little thing I want to remember:

The boys are in Blue Knights- a Catholic boys club where they learn virtues each month. This month, they were talking about the Holy Spirit, and I suppose the project for the boys was to draw a picture of the Holy Spirit. Everyone was drawing a dove, or fire, and here's Sam, drawing a box. When asked what it was, he said it was a refrigerator. When the teacher asked further, why he was drawing a refrigerator, he said: "because it feeds us."

Deep stuff. :)

I've been wanting to post about the new year and all, since the beginning of the new year. :) This is about right for how behind I am with such things. :)

We had a blast with cousins over and had a fondue party. I never made fondue before, so I spent quite a bit on the fancy cheese and wine to make this classic sauce. Then I winged it making another cheese sauce with beer and plain old cheddar. Honestly, I didn't really like either. The kids tried, and dipped, but no one really thought it was the greatest thing ever. It was an awful lot of fun, though.

After cleaning up dinner, and some party music to clean up the toys a bit, we settled into watching an episode of Star Wars, our current movie series. Following that we delighted in chocolate fondue, which everyone did love. That took us close to midnight. We watched the ball drop, popped a few streamer firecrackers, and put all to bed. It was a really fun night. And I survived the whole night!! I was amazed.

So I don't usually make resolutions of any sort. I have been pondering a few things, though. I've read on other blogs about choosing one word to put into practice over the course of the year. Kind like a theme for the year. I like that idea. I have to admit, I'm not really thrilled with the word I came up with, but it just kept coming back to me. ACCEPTANCE.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/acceptance

Those definitions don't exactly describe what I envision when I see this word, but I can make it work. My acceptance has mostly to do with accepting anything, everything that the Creator sends me- day by day, moment by moment. It encompasses things like belief, and trust, and patience. It also means to me accepting others as they are: the good, the bad, the ugly, and again, being patient, charitable, trusting, that God has a plan for them, too. God is good, all the time. I am going to try to accept his goodness in whatever form it takes.

The other thing on my mind for the new year is a lovely theme song. I think this one will fit nicely.

I am a happy camper :)

My husband really is the best at getting gifts. Surprise gifts at that. I'd say he's good for the next ten years for this one! I absolutely love it!!!

Merry Christmas!

I did very little this year, at least it seems. I didn't get cards sent out, no cookies baked (but lots of cinnamon rolls instead). And I'm okay with that. We had a lovely Christmas. It all seemed to go by too quickly. And now, minutes from the twelfth day of Christmas, I'm hoping you all had a wonderful Christmas season as well. (I have to admit, the nesting part of me is ready to be packed and finished with Christmas, and settle into waiting for baby!)

We had our first trip to the ER last night. It was after dinner, when my kids are wound up and happy. Somehow DD started running from the kitchen to the living room with Blaise in tow. I don't think he realized Blaise had somehow lost his footing. Blaise fell with some force, and hit his little forehead on the door jam corner. I scooped Blaise up, and when I flipped him over, saw this huge gash on his head, and tissue beneath that's supposed to be covered with skin! Scary! Dan and I instantly knew he needed stitches. We told the kids to get their shoes on. Thankfully, the gash didn't bleed like crazy. But, oh, how my baby kept crying.

We hesitated a moment trying to decide where to go. Urgent care? ER? I thought an urgent care would be just fine, but I came to the realization that Dayton doesn't have a children's urgent care, save for in Springboro...which closes at 8p on Sunday. It was 8:02. I was pretty sure a regular urgent care wouldn't touch him because he was so young. After a quick call to a friend, we decided Children's it was.

The ride there was fine. Blaise had calmed down, although he kept trying to touch his head. He would shake it from side to side and cry 'donk head'.

Dan dropped me off at the ER, then he was going to take the kids home, and have my mom come and stay with them so he could come back with me. I'm not sure how other families do it, but I didn't want to wait the whopping ten minutes for my mom to come over before we left.

I was a bit nervous about being at the hospital. I don't know why my worries centered around us not vaccinating our kiddos! But I honesty rationalized myself out of those worries, and turned them into elements of gratitude. I was grateful for having an understanding pediatrician, and living in a country where we are allowed to make decisions such as these.

Blaise loved the waiting room, and touched every little germy toy in there. He approached every other "baby" (toddlers) he saw, wanting to hug, or shove them, I don't know. Who knows how many germs we came home with- but for the record, he did have many false alarm bathroom breaks, so we washed hands several times.

It probably took an hour total, from when I walked in the door to when they took us back to the exam room. Dan had come by then, and I was so thankful. I knew they would have to restrain him to do the stitches, and I knew that alone would make him wail. But I knew they had to do in, and was okay with it. So they asked Dan to lay him on the little restraint board as I watched them velcro him in. A large male nurse was there to hold Blaise's head immobile. Him and the Physician's assistant (doing the stitches) took their seats, while Dan stood, holding Blaise's hands and talking to him.

They turned on some lovely calming background music and got started. I was sitting in the chair in the corner first, and then would alternate between sitting and standing and talking to Blaise.

Blaise did as expected and cried the moment he left Dan's arms, to the moment he returned to those strong arms: approx 8 min. About a minute into the stitches, I sat in the chair and tears began falling from me as well. I knew these guys were doing what they had to do. I was okay with that. I knew Blaise was 'fine' in a sense that he wasn't in agonizing pain or anything. It's just hearing your baby cry, and knowing you can't do anything to comfort him was very, very difficult. And maybe just being aware of truly how much you love a child- well, it just made me cry.

Until I remembered that Dan doesn't do so well with blood. I got up and asked if he was okay. He nodded, although he kept turning his head when the needle would go into Blaise. I asked again, and then realized that Dan wanted to be right where he was, so I just kept talking to Blaise.

I think it was a little funny how they staff chit chat with you a little. At one point the nurse, after seeing me sitting, crying looked over and asked if I was okay. I nodded. Then a little later, after we were both talking to, and soothing Blaise, he asked if this was our first time here. We admitted it was. Yep, you could tell. We were both so shaken up by our baby needing ten stitches. Later Dan reflected, 'How were we supposed to act?' that would've made it look like we've done this before. I find it hard to believe I wouldn't have cried...no matter how old my child, no matter how 'simple' the procedure. We both felt reassured by each other that we did exactly what we were supposed to. We definitely weren't interfering with their work by our attempts to comfort Blaise.

Afterward, Dan was fairly pale. He sat down, but refused a drink offered by this kind, and concerned nurse. After they left, I joked that he really was a bit pale. He said he knew how he felt, and he was not going to faint. He mentioned that it really wasn't the blood that made him feel that way, because there really was very little blood. He said it was more...empathy. (Dan's had pretty serious stitches in the past). "I mean, I know how that feels...and...." his voice kinda trailed off, and I filled it in with "...and he's our baby." He nodded as I sat there holding our sleeping kiddo.

When we got home, Blaise was still asleep so we laid him in our bed. He did fine for about an hour, but then woke up restless and in pain. "Donk head!" he'd say through tears. We gave him some remedy, but that and being in our bed was not getting him to sleep so we gave him some Tylenol.

That did the trick. he's still snoozing, which I think is where I'm headed next.